Any Questions?
Boys, Boys, Boys
Question
We received a ton of questions about boys and finding a boyfriend! Here’s what Chris has to say…
Answer
It’s really neat to hear that some of you are getting interested in boys. This is normal as you approach your teen years. Boys are wonderful creations of God but so are girls. Many times it’s easy to confuse this fact with the belief that boys are wonderful and if I have the attention of a boy then I must be wonderful. This attitude will cause a girl to change who God created her to be into something that she thinks a guy would like. This can have negative consequences and lead to a lot of sadness and loneliness. Unfortunately, this idea to become something for a guy’s attention is very much a part of what’s seen in television shows, movies, and music.
My advice to you is to focus on being someone, not something. Develop the neat qualities, talents, and interests that God has given you. By doing this, you’ll become confident in yourself and won’t have to look to a guy to make you feel important. When you and your parents agree that it’s OK for you to date, you’ll have these qualities, talents, and interests to talk about. Your dates will be so much more interesting!
Here are some other things you need to think about. First, boys take a little longer to be interested in girls and even then they often have a hard time talking about it. The way boys communicate can be so different from girls. Teasing and joking can mean that a boy likes you as well as dislikes you! It’s better for you to wait until the boy can talk clearly about his feelings for you. Second, most boys don’t respond positively to being “chased.” If you try too hard, they will often push you away. The safest way to go is to be friends. Third, the good guys like real girls—those who are confident and take care of themselves (good hygiene, appropriate makeup and clothing).
Last, don’t rush into this part of your life. There are so many other things to experience. I pray that you allow God to shape you into what He created you to be!